Friday Chat w/ Vlad
Hey, it’s Vlad. I had to end my chat abruptly last week due to Yuri’s “situation”. Yuri is fine by the way. He got the 15 cream puffs in his mouth and said “I’ma lick” meaning he was gonna lick the box the cream puffs came in. Everyone thought he said “Heimlich” cause well…he had 15 cream puffs in his mouth.
Ok, now back to my “tail”.
In his vision, caused from an assault by Gen. Chang’s chicken, the master saw an African painted dog. These canids form large packs which make them one of the most successful hunters on the African plains. The thought, “Strength comes not from you, but from those around you” permeated the masters soul. As quickly as that vision faded away, another flickered into view. It was a Swift fox. This is the smallest of the American foxes. “When size is not on your side use swiftness to turn the tide” was heard on the blowing wind. The masters last vision was of a capybara. The only non canid he saw, perhaps brought on by his recent trip to Brazil. While there, he bore witness to the famous Porto de Moz capybara stampede. This wonder of the world is induced by the locals throwing guava rinds into the Xingu river. The supersized guinea pigs come running from miles around to feast upon this banquet. Capybaras are the world’s largest rodents but even with their three inch incisors are still friends to all the animals of the forest. Don’t mistake this congenial attitude with a lack of fighting spirit and courage however. Every morning capybaras take a relaxing bath in nearby watering holes.. which are full of anacondas, piranha and black caiman, a 15 foot crocodilian. What have you done before breakfast?
Master Kikkoman regained his senses to the sound of clanking silverware...Oh my god!!. You know how they say lightening never strikes in the same place twice? Well it does if it’s name is Yuri. The other foxes told him they had some baklava imported from Greece and they would give him some if he could get his limbs behind his head. Now he’s flopping around the enclosure like a big furry pretzel. I need to go untangle him and tell him not to be so gullible. My work is never done.
Vlad out.