Friday Chat w/ Vlad
Hey, it’s Vlad. Today I’m gonna answer a few letters from members of my fan club. Yes...I have a fan club. It’s members are no doubt highly intelligent, good looking, delightful smelling, morally virtuous individuals. Real pillars of society. They join because they want to celebrate ME, & become canid crusaders. By my side, they fight for the lives of canids everywhere. They call themselves...the VLADIATORS.
The first letter comes from Chase, writing from Mud Butte SD
“Dear Vlad. What’s the deal between you and Lucan? Sometimes it seems like you two are the best of friends and other times it seems like you want to put cyanide in his kibble. #vladiatorsrule”
Chase, relationships can be complicated. Lucan and I get along fine and we both love our roles as ambassadors at JABCECC. You need to understand that we are very different beings. We agree when we can, disagree when we must, and always keep in mind that we share a common purpose. A great philosopher once said that relationships are like farts... If you push them too hard you’re just gonna get 💩.
The next letter is by Ruth of Humptulips WA.
“Hi Vlad ❤️ You are Soooo awesome and you’re such a hunk 💜. Will you marry me???❤️ 👰♀️ “
Hi Ruth, I am very flattered, really...but for obvious reasons it would never work out. 🦊 ≠👩
Now we’ll hear from Tammy Sue from Bugtussle KY.
“Howdy Vlad darlin’. Let me just say I’m happier than ol’ Blue layin’ on the porch, chewin’ on a big ol’ catfish head to be a Vladiator. I have loved foxes since I was knee high to a grasshopper. And you Vlad, you are to foxes as Waffle House is to high cholesterol. I reckon the awful things that some people do to canids makes me madder than a mule chewin’ on bumblebees. This Vladiator is ready to kick those evil doers where sun don’t shine.”
Hi Tammy Sue. Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit. Your letter made me grin more than a possum eatin’ a sweet tater.
Well what do you think? Aren’t my VLADIATORS awesome? Do you think you have what it takes to join the club? Can you imagine the joy it would bring you to think about my greatness 24/7? Tell me about it in the comments
- Vlad out