Friday Chat w/ Vlad - January 24th, 2025
Hey, it's Vlad. Welcome to my second chat of
2025. As you well know, it is my job here at the Judith A Bassett Canid Education and Conservation center to make sure everything runs as smoothly as a buttered otter on a slip and slide. When it does not it is my duty to report on it. So today I will be telling you about my fellow ambassador's dismal failures in adhering to their New Year's resolutions.
I'm sure it comes as a shock to no one that first I will be discussing Yuri... You know, Mr. new year new me. Well he made a resolution to give up sweets. For the record Yuri isn't exactly known for his will power. As a matter of fact Yuri is to will power as a neutered cat is to testicles.
Everyone thought Yuri was doing great until we started to question whether bear claw aroma could stay on one's breath for a week. I found Yuri's day planner and it was all the evidence I need to see that he failed. He had the days of the week marked as follows. Macaroon Monday, Turnover Tuesday, Waffle Wednesday, Think I'll have a Bear Claw Thursday, Fritter Friday, S'more Saturday, and of course Sundae Sunday. When I confronted Yuri about this he just said he was carb loading for an upcoming marathon. Yuri in a marathon??? As they say when pigs fly.
Then there is Lucan. He made a resolution to be more conscientious about his grooming and more particularly his bodily aromas. Guest have on occasion likened his smell to that of a wet Sasquatch. How our guests know what a wet Sasquatch smells like I have no idea. Anyway Lucan resolved to be more cooperative about his baths and resist that urge to scent roll in every funky substance he can find. By the way, many of the funky substances he makes him self. He started out the new year with a bath but it was soon evident that either the bath did not take or he "refunkified" himself as we once again had people saying we were keeping a Bigfoot on the premises.
I do want to give a shout out to Maksa who resolved to work on her fitness. Thus far she is still feeling the burn.
Vlad out.